Текст песни Bloodhound Gang - Why is Everybody Always Pickin' On Me?

Why is everybody always pickin' on me?The morn' that I was born
my old man beat up the doctorHe clocked the doctor cause the
doctor said I looked like ChewbaccaThe doctor said sir you're
misled sir which infers you mistook meI did not mean your lovely
wife was shackin' up with a wookieWhat I mean is Wolverine is
less hairy than your sonHe's looks like Chewie Baba Booey Baba
Booey and Hong Kong Phooey allin oneTo put it mild your new-born
child's completely nutty fu-fu lookin'I'd shove him back into
the oven until he is done cookin'But why's everybody always pickin'
on me?Cause my fifteen year-old cousin has less acneBut why's
everybody always pickin' on me?Ain't brushed them teeth since
1983But why's everybody always pickin' on me?Cause you got the
grooming habits of a chimpanzeeBut why's everybody always pickin'
on me?Cause you're white but you got a nose like Bill CosbyWhy's
everybody always pickin' on me?Always pickin' and rippin' apart
poor ol' Jimmy Pop AliI got a schnoz like the 'Cos' but there's
a lot more wrong with youSo back me up Bill yea and you're ugly
tooSo what if I brush my teeth with a piece of cheddar cheeseOr
where a fish net shirt by Chams with my Sergio Valenti jeansAnd
my mirror never lies but it always verifiesI got more cheese
and pepperoni than a homemade pizza pieYou compare me to a Monchichi
but I don't understandWhy I'm scorned like I'm deformed like
the Elephant ManAnd yea I took my mom to the prom but hey she
asked me firstBut at least this time I didn't find my date in
the back of a hearseAbout as popular with the girls with Englebert
HumperdinkAnd that might be 'cause everybody calls me Shrinky
DinkI know I'm known as Polaroid I'm not a total retardIt's cause
I'm done in sixty seconds and you'll still want it enlargedBut
why's everybody always pickin' on me?Cause ya wore velour flares
until the late EightiesBut why's everybody always pickin' on
me?Cause you run like a girl and sit down to peeBut why's everybody
always pickin' on me?Cause your only school chum was the lunch
ladyBut why's everybody always pickin' on me?You took your mom
to the prom but still got luckyLike that episode where Gilligan
gets sick of being teasedAnd he breaks into the Professor's lab
and makes some LSDPeaks freaks and eats the Skipper's brains
then beats Ginger withcoconutsAs Mr. Howell and Lovey burn alive
inside their grass hutOh he'll kill again that Gilligan they
he should of let him beAnd like a postal clerk I'll go berserk
if you don't stop teasing meSee the trick is only pick on those
that can't do you no harmLike the drummer from Def Leppard's
only got one armThe drummer from Def Leppard's only got one armThe
drummer from Def Leppard's only got one armThe drummer from Def
Leppard's only got one armThe drummer from Def Leppard's only
got one armThe drummer from Def Leppard's only got one armThe
drummer from Def Leppard's only got one armThe drummer from Def
Leppard's only got one armThe drummer from Def Leppard's only
got one armBut why's everybody always pickin' on me?Cause my
fifteen year-old cousin has less acneBut why's everybody always
pickin' on me?Ain't brushed them teeth since 1983But why's everybody
always pickin' on me?Cause you got the grooming habits of a chimpanzeeBut
why's everybody always pickin' on me?Cause you're white but you
got a nose like Bill CosbyBut why's everybody always pickin'
on me?Cause ya wore velour flares until the late EightiesBut
why's everbody always pickin' on me?Cause you run like a girl
and sit down to peeBut why's everbody always pickin' on me?Cause
your only school chum was the lunch ladyBut why's everbody always
pickin' on me?Cause no one likes you monkey boy